Editorials

Brave Third World

Apr 02, 2007 - Comments: 3

remember these cynical observations, from back in 2000? when george and his jack-booted republican thugs had just stolen their first election?

1. Imagine that we read of an election occurring anywhere in the third world in which the self-declared winner was the son of the former prime minister and that former prime minister was himself the former head of that nation's secret police (CIA).

2. Imagine that the self-declared winner lost the popular vote but won based on some colonial holdover (electoral college) from the nation's past.

Dogs In The Street

Mar 23, 2007 - Comments: 3

i was away for a while; did i miss anything?

mmmm ...... democrats are authorizing subpoenas? how did this happen? subpoenas for rove? for miers? for the bushie crew? is this stem cell research growing backbones?

The New Math

Mar 12, 2007 - Comments: 1

did you hear me shrieking? when "scooter with the cuter pooter" got found guilty? i know he'll live up to his nickname, "scooter," when he's taking a shower in the facilities .... and one of those big, hairy new friends he's going to make says, "hey bitch ..... i dropped my soap .... now .... pick it up for me ....."

he's very contrite, too ..... he said to king george, "i'm so sorry ..... won't you pardon me?"

The Year of the Locust

Mar 06, 2007 - Comments: 0

do you know about the seventeen year locust? it lives on the eastern seaboard, and it was a part of my world when i was growing up there .... the female lays her eggs in slits in branches; the larvae hatch and drop to the ground, where they burrow in ..... it takes them up to seventeen years to mature; they emerge from the earth, shed their skin, leaving dried husks on trees and telephone poles, and they have locusts-gone-wild-spring-break for a week ..... i don't know if they stridulate, which is a great word and something that crickets do .....

Of Mice and Men

Feb 28, 2007 - Comments: 1

i have a pot roast cooking on the stove, and the smell of it is permeating the house ...... it's a nice smell, rich and warm and homey and comforting ........hey, if you're a vegetarian, i'm sorry .... no, i'm not sorry that you get upset about my cooking a roast ..... i'm just sorry that you're a vegetarian .....

Intelligence Failures

Feb 28, 2007 - Comments: 1

you know, i'm wondering why the white house didn't intervene in anna nicole's affairs, like they did with terri schiavo; both bitches were dead, and both were grabbing plenty of fine media attention, at a time when you'd want what passes for media attention focused as far away from the appalling idiocy, the staggering retardation, the grandiose ineptitude, of our duly selected offal .... i mean, officials .....

Sarcoptic Mange and You

Feb 15, 2007 - Comments: 1

yes, it's me again, with more media commentary .....

bleauughghghhhhhrrrggggggHEEEEEEunngngngngn speeeeeeeewwwwwwiiieeeeeeeeeeee gag ag ag aga agagagagagaga wheeeeUUUUUUUULLLLLP ....

here's consecutive headlines for you:

"Report Says Pentagon Manipulated Intel"
"Pentagon Says Pre-War Intel Not Illegal"
"Gates: U.S. Can Prove Iran's Iraq Role"

"Deadly Bombs Made In Iran!"

Virgin Birth and Other Faith Based Initiatives

Feb 07, 2007 - Comments: 2

gee, it seems like only yesterday i was biking down highway one with my wife on her birthday; a forty-five mile ride with no cars, on a beautiful day, and now i'm back in the real word of the dummercratics, the repulicunz, war, and i've been on an endless hold to speak with the website provider that disappeared my site for a week and now has me on hold yet again because .... well ..... they're not liable for anything .....

corporate responsibility at its finest .....

Nobility

Feb 01, 2007 - Comments: 2

skwah the bald eagle was hungry .... he'd been soaring over the arctic tundra for days, floating high on the thermals that wafted off denali, but he could see nothing ..... once the land was rich with game, seen easily by his sharp eyes, but now it was different .... reeking black pools shimmered in sunlight that seemed hotter than usual, black pools of a thick and viscous fluid dripping from an endless networks of pipes that laced across once pristine land .....

Hey, Honey .... Pass Me The Pork

Jan 26, 2007 - Comments: 1

today's aol, always a benchmark in cretinism, retardation, and retrograde republican shit, said something about bush no longer being "the decider," but rather is now "the one who makes decisions ...."

i guess it depends on what your definition of "is" is .....

mine is, he's a "fucking shithead ...... "

this 'news' article went on to say that bush asked people not to be critical of his "new plan" until they'd given it a "chance to work ....."

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