The Devil Finds Work For Idle Thoughts

geeeziz, pete ..... are you okay? i think you scared people with the last editorial .... no one wrote in, like they were all cowering under their beds, hanging with the dust bunnies, waiting until the department of homeland security lowered the terr-ah alert ...... i mean, dr. pete .... are you feeling alright? are you still taking your meds? you called our president .... you called him "evil" and i think you used the word "asshole" to describe a great man ......

i sure hope you feel better soon and start writing about kittens again ..... and puppies, too ..... they're so darned cute!

the devil'll find work for idle thoughts ..... i have no shortage of them ..... oooooooohhhhh ..... maybe i can outsource some of them! lemme share! lemme share! i wanna share!

in the wake of "gardener reform" and "housecleaner reform" and the protests in major metropolitan areas, it occurred to me that the world is ever a smaller place: globalization means that our corporations can send our jobs overseas to cut labour costs drastically, throwing huge sections of the american middle class out of work, out of healthcare, and out of their homes ..... but we won't let anybody into this country to work because we don't want them taking jobs away from white .... i mean, americans .....

guess we want 'em all to go overseas .... to china ..... so the chinese will own this country in another twenty-five years ......

although i'm pleased to see the proposal of a "guest worker" program, one that allows people to come in and work for con-agra and archer-daniels-midland and other corporations, before we toss 'em back out of the country ..... good thing, too; don't you hate gettin' a burger without a slice of silicone-tit hard tomato? and some nice nutritious iceberg lettuce?

guest workers, does that mean they get put up in marriots?

i like flexibilty of thought; joseph smith, founder of the church of the latter day saints, was handed the ummum and thummin by the angel moroni ..... these fabled glasses allowed him to read a document that no one else could and, oddly enough, the doctrines of the religion he espoused seemed to .... mmmmm ..... favour him .... by the same token, very special christians in america have special vision that ..... well, let me back up a minute here; did you know that the ten commandments, the decalogue, has footnotes? but that you have to be a very special person, a most chosen person, to see them? to read them?

yes .... "thou shalt not kill" actually has a number of footnotes ..... 1) unless i want to; 2) unless i feel like it; 3) unless you piss me off; 4) unless there's oil underneath you; 5) unless i want to fuck your wife (cf. this footnote also applies to "thou shalt not covet etc. ...")

or 5) whatever else i think of at the time i feel like wasting your ass .....

speaking of assholes who find truth and history convenient walnut shells with which they can con the rubes into playing three card monte, i like little george saying that the "internecine" (i can't imagine what his mouth must look like as he struggles with a four syllable word) strife in eye-rack is due to saddam hussein and the baathists stirring the animosity between factions ....

actually, because i read--and i know that you do, too--i know that saddam was the foremost factor in keeping all the factions quiet and under control .... saddam's removal opened the pandora's box of historical grudges that, with our synergistic entry into the iraq, bubbles, bubbles, toils and troubles as we see it today .....

this is like george saying, "we "toppled" sah-dom .... but he ..... he ..... still rules! we removed him from power ..... but .... he's still in power!"

speaking of shocking, i wonder why celebrity gossip, like getting divorced, getting laid, getting busted, and getting fat, is always "shocking," but the president of the united states, being a lying, cretinous, megalomaniacal evil fuck, who invades countries willy-nilly, peers into your bedroom; looks at your reading list; watches you download porn, and kidnaps people so he can torture them ..... this isn't shocking?

that it isn't shocking is shocking ..... i'd like to see the new york times come out with a headline like "shocking revelations: bush an asshole!"

speaking of horseshit--and we were--have you noticed that protests are always "violent?" it could be kindergarteners, marching for fresher milk and grahams, but "they could turn violent!" funny how, well ...... invading iraq isn't violent; it's in a ratings race with monday night football .... leaving new orleans in the lurch isn't violent ..... it's ..... it's ..... urban renewal policy ..... but people who take to the street (other than in rush hour, of course) to let the government know they've detected the latest buggery, well ....

they're violent protesters ....

speaking of buggery--and we were--what's all this noise about steroids? we're going to "investigate steroid use in baseball?" gimme a fucking break .... why don't we investigate steroid use by california politicians? what's the difference? you mean there's a shelf life on being a drug abuser? and how did all those football players get to be so big? selective breeding?

and why am i asking you all these questons?

did you know that black kangaroo is being bootlegged on compact disc? it showed up on amazon, and i was alerted to this by a kanga-guardian angel ..... her agitations, coupled with some letters that i wrote, led to its removal ..... but it was an interesting experience in the kind of republican "blame the victim" mindset so prevalent ..... the cheap little shit who was offering inferior and unauthorized merchandise for sale demanded that i prove black kangaroo was mine and that i owned the rights to it ..... then, in reply to the deluge of cease-and-desist mail he was getting, he wrote a review of black kangaroo ..... i'll synopsise it for you:

black kangaroo-and peter kaukonen--suck .......

well .... why sell it then?

silly question, this being america and all .....

the long and the short of this is, there's what appears to be something called "lake eerie records" that's pushing kanga-garbage ..... it's clearly not a remaster, does not include bonus tracks and, of course, does not provide me with a dime with which i can put gas in the ferrari i bought with all my black kangaroo sales .....

i haven't been able to find an address for these fine folk ..... if any of you do, please .....

let me know ........

next: dr. pete takes a nap

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
PETER KAUKONEN, San Francisco Bay Area guitarist, has played, toured, and recorded with Black Kangaroo, Jefferson Airplane, Jefferson Starship, and Johnny Winter.

2 Comments

Steve Shaw says:

Hi Dr Kanga, I am from Illinois originally, Dekalb and that zip code sounds like it is around Chicago some place. I am going back home in a few weeks, I will see what the old graybeard can dig up for you on who to 'sik' on em with Illinois gov. As a former resident, I can tell you that the state of Illinois can be very, very nasty to those who break the law. Lets hope in their case that they get to be 'guests of the state' and get the biggest, horniest "bubba' in Joliet to be their roomate. I am sure that they will have their 'dance card' filled pretty damn quick! Sorry to hear folks are ripping you off. "a pox upon thier heads!"

Submitted by Steve Shaw on Thu, 07/17/2014 - 14:02
Maureen Valley says:

Gee..it can't be this easy but this is what I found.
Lake Eerie Records
12 Hill St.
Sea Point, Illinois 60611

Submitted by Maureen Valley on Thu, 07/17/2014 - 14:03

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