Editorials

There's No Fuel Like An Oil Fuel

Jul 07, 2010 - Comments: 1

i started this back when there was that tiny little error in the gulf of mexico, when bullshit petroleum was partying down and neglected some fundamental safety considerations like "don't have a lit cigarette in your mouth when you're filling your tank" as well as neglecting to figure out what the fuck they might do other than buy up "the media" and "the congress" and "the senate" and "the president" when shit went wrong and i don't know about you but there's always shit going wrong in my life unanticipated hammerblows of mortality like last week when i was riding singletrack in tamarancho

Impregnation Without Representation

Apr 21, 2010 - Comments: 0

i know i've said this before, but i'm finding it increasingly difficult to write anything that's relevant, enlightening, and not purely scatological .... it's hard, and it doesn't seem to get any easier ..... i know i've said this before: i'd like to write an editorial consisting of something other than "oh my GOD are we being FUCKED the stupid have taken over the WORLD and are driving us to PERDITION to the NTH DEGREE?" .....

Domesticatin' Tay-Ror

Feb 22, 2010 - Comments: 1

honest to god, boys 'n' girls, we got more good news this week: death is america's biggest business, and we ain't aimin' to go outta bidness any tahm soon ..... last editorial was about wimmin gittin' their equality on and now i'm gonna write up andrew joseph stack III of--where else--texas, who flowed his pooper stub into an irs bildin .....

Back To School

Feb 18, 2010 - Comments: 0

i've been seriously depressed of late, but fuck that, i'm going to find the silver lining in every shit brown cloud, and i'm starting now .....

Fill In The Blank

Feb 11, 2010 - Comments: 0

you know, it just is so hard to write editorials now; i started this one eight days ago and am finally thinking, i gotta finish it up and publish it, strike a blow for freedom and .... no ..... ha ha .... i'm not kidding myself but .... it's not just that i'm hard at work on a new album--see? i still call 'em albums?--it's just that i can't take "the news" any more .....

Up Your Irony

Jan 27, 2010 - Comments: 1

have you been taking your irony supplement? i hope so; i'm taking mine in football sized rectal suppositories; that way i can distend my sphincter and stretch my cloaca for the impending corporate plunder and penetration, plus i need massive doses to make it through the daze: i just can't be bothered to be popping pills--they just won't keep up ....

Take Your Irony Supplement

Jan 19, 2010 - Comments: 1

jesus, it's hard writing this shit these days ..... irony's died a sad and lonely death in this fucking country ... i was going to ask if anyone could explain to me why god hates haiti .... i was going to ask you if you could explain to me why nobody calls god out for killing 65,000 people but it's a miracle if one child comes out alive from underneath a collapsed slum? 65,000 people dead .... yawn .... but oh my god! a white american got killed? send in the troops! he needs security!

The Naked Truth

Jan 08, 2010 - Comments: 1

hey! it's me! i'm back! did you miss me? wussup, dawg! yo! new year! new decade! eeeeeeeeeeeeee! same old shit! f--u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-u-k!

Iran .... All The Way Home .....

Jun 24, 2009 - Comments: 2

hey .... it's me again .... i thought i lost you when i said we should bomb kansas; did that frighten you? were you scared? nobody wrote in saying "yah, bro' .... right on! let's bomb kansas!" where were all the kudos? i don't think bombing kansas is over the top; we've had years of chanting and ranting and panting about how we should "bomb bomb bomb .... bomb bomb iran; bomb bomb bomb .... bom bom iran ....." why, that was even a presidential party platform in the last election, and nobody looked askance at it .....

Let's Carpet Bomb Kansas

Jun 03, 2009 - Comments: 1

thank god we don't have to have a discussion about torture any more and, by the same token, thank god we've won the war against terror--at least in iraq--and we don't have to read about that shit any more ....

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you know, it just is so hard to write editorials now; i started this one eight days a...
Thursday, February 11, 2010 - 10:52
i started this back when there was that tiny little error in the gulf of mexico, when...
Wednesday, July 7, 2010 - 11:56
i know i've said this before, but i'm finding it increasingly difficult to write anyt...
Wednesday, April 21, 2010 - 11:54
honest to god, boys 'n' girls, we got more good news this week: death is america's bi...
Monday, February 22, 2010 - 10:52
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