i thought i'd be gone, but i just couldn't leave it alone .... after, of course, the spewing of intestinal blood into the toilet ... that's what happens when i read the "papers" or listen to the "news" or tune into the radio and hear the whoreshit about our whoretime presid .... well, from now on i'm just going to refer to it as "the thing in the white house," kind of like an h.p. lovecraft novella, that goes from bad to worse to more sickening than you ever thought possible ....
oh, i was listening to n(ational) p(entagon) r(adio), cheerleader for ..... say, did you know that the thing in the whitehouse's main claim to academic fame was .... being a cheerleader? and that's what it does best? cheer for the rich, shill for .....
okay, i'm digressing .....it's attention deficit disorder brought about by reality-revulsion, the rippling contractions, the waves of nausea that run through me and leave me, gasping and shaking on the floor, like a wombat that's just passed a kidney stone ....
but that's another story, for another time ....
okay, the point:
republicans now have an election strategy, and it goes like this: "defy bush ...." "i'm defying bush ..." "hey, mommy ..... lookit me! i'm gonna stand up to bush ...." "we will now dissociate ourselves from the thing in the whitehouse ...." this is their strategy, and boy, does it have all the hallmarks of integrity, of honor, of the moral rectumtude and fortitude for which republicans are so famous .... campaign speeches'll go something like this: yes, for six long years i've been on my hands and knees with my pants down around my ankles, with the flaccid scrotum of the thing in the whitehouse bashing my lips and tongue .... yes, without question i've taken it up the ass and smiled while saying, "thank you sir may i have some more;" i've turned my back on morality and on honesty; i've sold myself out and not even because i was caught fucking goats in times square at high noon; i've been dishonest, a liar, and i've allowed--no, i've encouraged--genocide, mass murder, rapine and plunder, while destroying the reputation of the country i profess to love; i've allowed americans--yes .... americans!-- to go unprotected, without food, without water, and i've shit upon the rule of law .... but .....
that's all over .....
at least for the next two weeks ....
because ..... i've come to my senses .... and now ..... now i'm going to ..... stand up to that thing in the white house .....
have you watched kittens, how they reach a certain age and they start fluffing themselves up to look bigger than they are? and they start dancing sideways and backwards, hissing and spitting? and they practice this, over and over and over and over?
kittens are really cute when they pretend they're tought ..... republicans are never cute, and this isn't being tough; this is being gut-wrenching repugnant dead-hyena-two-weeks-in-the-fucking-sun-stenched disgusting .....
you odious scumbags: you've all the moral purity of a pox-mucked whore's cleft, and we all know full well that, as soon as the election is over, you'll be squabbling and bickering, shit-smeared little piglets ramming up to the corporate teat, squealing for the lobbyists' slop, and shrieking for scraps from the table of that thing in the white house ......
scumbags .....
speaking of scumbags, i was listening to national propaganda radio today, and i kept hearing things like "well, to win the war in iraq ...." "mmmmphhhhh ..... hummpppphhh .... more troops in iraq, send in more troops ..... bummmphhh mmmmppnnn .... extend the time of the troops over there .... mmmphhh hmmmphhhhh ...... those iraqis, they gotta toughen up and ..... mmmphhhh hmmmphhhh blllmmmmm ..... my god, if we leave, it might turn into .... gasp! a civil war ....."
jesus h. fuck, why do these fucking cretins get airtime with my fucking tax dollars? and why do we waste that air time on talking points from that thing in the white house? it's not like there's a shortage of toxic waste dumps on air that dispense that bilge around the clock .... first of all, i love the "we broke it even though you asked us not to and now it's up to you to come up with a plan to fix it and if you don't, the nyah nyah nyah on you ...."
plus, i don't know what "win the war in iraq" means, neither do you, nor does anyone ..... what would "winning the war" look like? statues of that thing go up where the statues of saddam used to be? morgues go out of business? to say that we're fighting a war legitimatizes all the lies and deceptions and spurious "goals" we were given as the rationale for our pre-emptive unilateral invasion .... and we're not fighting terrorist; they're people who are fighting an occupying army of foreign invaders when they're not killing each other ..... and jesus, this whoreshit about "well, gee ..... if we leave it'd destablize the region" is ......
well, thank god it's rock solid right now, thanks to our enlightened presence and bliss-bestowing hands ....
as for the "it'll lapse into civil war," please help me, lord, and smite these assholes on their face and chops ..... i can't even keep track of how many people were killed in the last week .... can you? do you know? does anyone care?
i'm sorry ... i ..... i ..... well ..... i meant well ..... honest, all i wanted to do was play my guitar ..... and sell my records ......
so listen up, mr. and misses lib'ral: if you don't buy my fucking records, i'm going to have to keep writing this shit, because i won't have anything else to talk about .....
so, like the washington post columnist who's just blamed the devastation of lebanon on the lebanese--rather than the israelis that bombed the shit out of them--i'm blaming each one of these editorials on you .....
hey, you! it's all your fault!
next: nothing for two weeks
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