i'm having a real hard time here and, if i were you, i wouldn't bother with this shit; i'd go watch oprah .... or have a miller lite .... or rub bacon grease in my hair .... or figure out who the fuck jen is ..... no, this one's been really hard to write, and it's all about cognitive dissonance ... i've got cognitive dissonance in a big way, and i can't resolve it ....