Editorials

Tell A Vision

May 18, 2006 - Comments: 0

i haven't always not had a television .... in fact, i have one right now: i bought it in 1987, from one of those "i'm mad melvin ..... i'm right on the corner, i'm right on the price, and i'm close to every turnpike exit known to man ..... and i'll eat the asshole of a rabid chihuahua if that's what it takes to convince you to buy your iron lung from me ....." i bought a videotape player, which i still have, and a panasonic food processor from the store at the same time ..... the food processor was great, and i'm sorry i sold it .....

Science Friction

May 13, 2006 - Comments: 3

i haven't written for a while, the reason being a major depressive episode .... you know why? you know what could make me disconsolate, inconsolable, and down? feel forlorn, hopeless, and helpless? wake up in the mo'nin'/feelin' so bad/lawse hab de wuss ol' feelin'/man mos' evah done had?

Dead Diary

Apr 27, 2006 - Comments: 1

gosh, what an exciting week, dear diary! why, i've heard that there's a debate going on in congress--or is it the senate?--where our duly purchased representatives are falling all over themselves to give our wonderful president, that handsome, dashing, decisive man!

It's A Mad Mad Mad Mad World

Apr 22, 2006 - Comments: 3

i'm a dreamer, you know? a weaver, a visionary, one who sees better worlds even as he rummages through dumpsters, looking for gold .... an example? why, just a week ago, when i sat down with my coffee and started checking out "the news," here's what i read on the front page of the washington post:

The Left, Online and Outraged
Liberal Blogger Finds an Outlet and a Community
By David Finkel Washington Post Staff Writer
Saturday, April 15, 2006; Page A01

Booking

Apr 15, 2006 - Comments: 1

we went out of town last weekend ..... we packed the boys in the car and drove off to mammoth, which is three hundred and sixty miles away and at nine thousand feet ..... great skiing, you know, what with the unprecedented rains we've had in california this year ..... but you'd be a fool and a communist dupe to ascribe this to anything like global climate change which is, as we all know, another theory, like evolution, that has no basis in corporate--or republican--reality ....

About Average

Apr 03, 2006 - Comments: 0

here's a recent headline from the washington post: "The President as Average Joe .... Trying to Boost Support, Bush Brings Banter to the People"

why do i keep reading the washington post? gosh, we know it's a tampon for the republican party, but still ..... i keep hoping that the kind of integrity and journalistic testes that led to the watergate expose will .... but then, i still believe in the easter bunny .... sure, i've read the bible .... sure, there's no mention of either "chocolate" or "bunny" in it, but i believe, i believe, i believe ....

The Devil Finds Work For Idle Thoughts

Mar 31, 2006 - Comments: 2

geeeziz, pete ..... are you okay? i think you scared people with the last editorial .... no one wrote in, like they were all cowering under their beds, hanging with the dust bunnies, waiting until the department of homeland security lowered the terr-ah alert ...... i mean, dr. pete .... are you feeling alright? are you still taking your meds? you called our president .... you called him "evil" and i think you used the word "asshole" to describe a great man ......

Reform This .......

Mar 27, 2006 - Comments: 0

i wrote this column before i read paul krugman today (march 27, 2006) ..... while i prefer not to let facts interfere with my preconceptions, i must defer to mr. krugman's impeccable politics and knowledge, this time regarding illegal immigration and its impact on keeping wages low, in that employers would rather pay low wages with no benefits, and illegals will tolerate that ..... still, here's my column .... it's not just hystrionics .... it's putting passion back into the body politic .......

12 Steps To Better Abs .... tinence

Mar 23, 2006 - Comments: 1

another newspaper snippet: "Millions of dollars in taxpayer funds have flowed to groups that support President Bush's agenda on abortion and other social issues.

Under the auspices of its religion-based initiatives and other federal programs, the administration has funneled at least $157 million in grants to organizations run by political and ideological allies, according to federal grant documents and interviews."

Polly's Got The Flu

Mar 16, 2006 - Comments: 5

this is from the washington post; i couldn't even begin to make up shit like this:

"Speaking at a flu summit meeting in Wyoming Friday, Mike Leavitt, the president's health and human services secretary, said that Americans can't expect the federal government to take care of them if a pandemic strikes. His advice: Stockpile food in your bedroom.

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